Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Another year comes to an end....and we know what that means!!??

I have never been one to stick to a resolution. Mostly because they were to go on a diet, or to get fit. But this year I want to set one that is entirely achievable, so I will.

My resolution for 2011, is to go to bed!! I waste so much time sitting in front of my laptop, watching so much mind numbing television, when I could be in bed. I am going to start reading again. I love to disappear into a book, and really have no excuse what so ever to not be reading. I have a heap of non fiction books and also some motivational books in a pile to read. So I am going to start tonight. I might have to be Reading on the couch for a while before bed, but I aim to turn the TV off by 9-930 and lose myself. My DD is still needing to be taken to the toilet about 10.30pm so bedtime for me gets put off so I can take her to the toilet. I'd rather go to bed later and not have to do a load of washing before work in the morning.

So I will try to start tonight!! Will see how I go, its an easy one to stick to.....but I bet I don't...but isn't that the whole point of resolutions?

Friday, December 17, 2010

My first taste of negativity...

and it doesn't bother me really because its not someone I know. Someone posted this about me in a forum I visit:
No offence but what is not exercising doing for your health? Nothing good. I would be concerned about your bone density, cardiovascular health and well being. Just because you are "skinny" now doesn't mean you are healthy and well from those photos you even looked a little bit drained and even undernourished.

I think going the surgery is cheating and lazy and will not have any good long term health effects if you do not combine it with exercise! Makes me sad.

My reply:
When a lot of the skinner photos were taken I was drained and under nourished. The surgery hasn't been an easy fix. I am 32. What would you rather I do, stay fat for the rest of my life? I tried on my own and I failed. Hundreds of times. I didnt go into this lightly. It cost me a lot of money, time and tears. I wondered if I'd done the right thing, my family thought I'd die because I lost too much weight. This has been far from easy.

But its had the desired outcome, and now I can stay awake for a whole day, I don't need to nap on the couch after going shopping at 10am. I have energy, last night my daughter and I even ran, just to the toilets whilst out, but 2 years ago, I would have been puffingn like an idiot and knocking people over.

I am not ashamed of what I have done, I am now where I want to be and after years of failure I intend to enjoy myself.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

1/2 of who I was....

This is going to be tough to type, not because I am emotional, but because my husband sharpens our knifes to within an inch of their lives, and thankfully the bone in my thumb has just prevented me from cutting it off, whilst making his lunch!

I don't weigh myself anymore. I don't bother. But today I went and bought a dress. I walked into the shop, saw one I loved (still getting used to that!) tried it on in a ten, tried it on in an eight and bought it! But standing there in the change room I noticed just how much of my ribs you can see. My chest is just bones, so I thought I'd weigh in to see if I have actually lost some weight. Turns out I have lost another kilo. No idea how, but its gone. Its kinda weird, I know I shouldn't be losing more weight, but its so empowering to be half the woman I was. 2 Christmas's ago I was dreading christmas day. It was always hot and unbearable, 1 christmas ago I was having issues, and was sick as a dog. This christmas I will be as strong as an ox!!!

Bring it on!!

Monday, November 1, 2010

Finally, My birthday wish...granted.......

This is me at my 30th birthday.....
This is me at my 32nd birthday!

Finally a birthday photo I wasn't afraid of having taken!! Woo Hoo!!!

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Something to do.....

I find myself falling asleep during the day, but unable to sleep at night. I get heaps done! Tonight I have done a weeks ironing, cleaned the kitchen, done a load of washing, on to my 2nd one. I have made 2 lots of cookies and have a frozen batch in the freezer! I am about to get up and hang out the 2nd load, and make lunches for tomorrow. Hopefully then I'll manage to get some sleep!

Anyway whilst filling in time waiting for the washing I found these poems that I love and have on my computer. So thought I'd post them here so I dont lose them!

I don’t want you to protect me when you feel like it..
I don’t want you to love me when things are happy and perfect…
I don’t want you to be there for me and look after me when I ask for it..

Protect me, even when we’re fighting…
Love me, even when we’re falling apart…
Be there for me, even when I say I don’t need you…

That’s what love is… that’s what I need..

My oath to you…..
When you are sad…… I will dry your tears
When you are scared…I will comfort your fears
When you are worried…I will give you hope
When you are confused…I will help you cope
And when you are lost, and can’t see the light
I shall be your beacon, shining ever so bright
This is my oath, I pledge to the end.

Saturday, October 9, 2010

Oh.My.God. The gluttens!

I have no idea if I spelt that correctly or not, but tonight has been an eye opener. I have just gotten home from dinner at Sizzler. We had a friend down from Mackay so our entire family + extras met her and her daughters at Sizzler for dinner. I can't believe that sizzler still have such a huge following! The que was out the door and around the corner!
People are just amazing. There is no time limit, yet everyone stumbles over each other to fill up their plates. At the desert bar there was a woman telling her friend to load up 2 plates so they didn't have to come back between plate loads, meanwhile others are waiting for the plates to be replenished. There was a table of kids near us, they were stuffing themselves like they'd never eaten before!

I was so embarrassed for people!

Truth be told, if I hadn't had my surgery, I would have been them. Thank god for my sleeve.

In other news......

there is something going on with my body. I am having panic attack type things where I feel like I need to eat and I need to eat right now. I used to get this pre sleeve, but just in the last few weeks its been getting worse. I am trying to increase my intake to stop the hunger panic happening. But I don't get hungry, so I can't judge my need to eat, I really only eat because I have to. I eat junk, and its my downfall. I think I might be needing to get my blood sugar level checked. I don't know if its because I am going slightly glyco or something, but it makes me feel terrible. I get the shakes, and hot spots on my arms, my face goes numb and I feel panicky. Its weird. So I will head off to the dr to get checked out. As I said above we just got back from sizzler and I felt like that. I had just eaten more than I usually do and I felt this weird feeling coming over me, like I had to eat. So I've had a coffee and a fruit filled bar and I'm off to bed to see if I wake up feeling better tomorrow!
Good night all!

Monday, October 4, 2010

Life is good.....

You know I really am so blessed. Yeah I have my issues, but who doesn't. I have a nice home, I make a comfortable living, I have the most precious little girl, who I am just loving to bits, even A is being a good boy!

My darling turned 6 on the 30th of September, and I made the cake that I had posted about previously. It was the first cake I've ever made her that I haven't been embarrassed to show others!
So here it is:

Not too bad if I do say so myself! :P And I do!

So in other news, since I blogged last, the little princess has had a dose of the chicken pox, lost a tooth, had school holidays, and now started her last term of Prep. My sister has resigned from the family company. Its left me feeling all kinds of weird. For starters, its going to be strange not to work with her.I love spending time with her, and work time is a bonus.....sometimes :P It's nice to walk away on holiday and know that someone I can trust to do my job properly is doing it. Its also brought up feelings of jealousy!! Even though I love my job, I would love soemthing that is nowhere near as responsible. I am dealing with a lot of responsibilty on a daily basis, I take my work home with me, in my head, my heart, and my computer! I can't let it go, I can't turn off, and for no reason whatsoever I get tummy drop. Bec will know what I am talking about. I have been here for 16 years in December, and I love being able to help people at the most difficult time in their lives and for them to tell me that I have eased their burden. That is why I love my job. But its a sensetive business, and I have to be empathetic at all times. Yeah I can joke with people after building up a rapor, but sometimes it'd be nice to go home at the end of a shift and my biggest responsiblity would be if the till balanced or not! Maybe I just need a holiday? I have one booked for April 2011, so I guess I can hang out till then!

I had a support group meeting on Sat for my surgeons paitents. It was really good. It was about the emotions that we deal with after weightloss. It was really quite interesting to hear others who are dealing with the exact same issues I have. There is a girl who was sleeved by my surgeon, who has also had problems not falling below a healthy weight. So its great to talk to her. Its such a great group, and I must get my butt into gear and organise a get together for us all.

Anyway I best not go on, I have all this stuff in my head to get down, so I may blog again today.......but probably not! :P
Have a nice day!

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

I feel blergh....

I have no idea why. Maybe its because I haven't had a decent coffee for ages, read days. I am so sick of paying for crap coffee. This week, well in 2 days I have spent nearly $30 on crap coffee and I am annoyed. Why can't people make consistant coffee. I only buy it from 3 different places and only one does consistanly good coffee. But they only make it in one size, and quite frankly its too small.

It might also have to do with not having enough sleep, my own fault, really, but I can complain if I want to :P

Anyway thought it was time for a blog, so there it is, theres a lot more to whinge about, but I won't....for once!

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Egh...I wanna go back to bed.....but it is improving...albeit slowly!

So my day started with a good point, and a bad point. Alarm goes off, and I hear the thump thump of little feet running up the hallway, and S bounds into the bedroom and jumps up on the bed. She turns the TV on, rolls over, puts her back to me, and demands I cuddle (or cuggle in her baby talk :P ) her. So I snuggle into her, and then realise that I have a THUMPING headache. I jump out of bed and leave her to snuggle while I had a hot shower. Nope didn't work. My sister drops her kids off, the minute she's out the door, we all jump in the car to go via Hungry Jacks on the way to school for breakfast. Its not really on the way, but its new so we have to try it. Order is taken, move forward to pay, didn't check the eftpos machine, just put in my pin number and sat there waiting for her to hand over the food. She (the girl at the window) goes trotting off, and the manager comes back. All apologetic saying we mucked up the transaction, you've been charged for another cars order. It was $3.95. So instead of charging me the difference, she refunds the $3.95, then charges me the $19 for our correct breakfast. While I was waiting for all that to go through, I was thinking of the girl who served me. Obviously she was afraid to tell me she'd screwed up and had to run and get a manager to deal with it. God if that was the biggest problem she had all day, she's gonna have a good day. If only the problems we all deal with on a daily basis are so easily fixed!

Anyway, Dad is here at work today, and it must be spring. He's been runing his eye over my work space, and dying to rearrange everything. So I let him at it. One room is totally rearranged, and I have nice and tidy set of cupboards. Its stuff I have been meaning to do for ages!!

So my day is getting better, the headache is gone, its a lovely temperature, Mum and Dad are having the kids on Saturday night, we go away next weekend for the princess's birthday, and life is good....mostly :P

Oh and FTR, I was recognised out on the weekend! We were at our local show, and someone asked me if I was Lib. She was sitting next to S waiting for a turn on the massive jumping castle thingo. She knows me from a forum I frequent, and has obviously seen my pics online! I have also been a follower of her blog! It's so weird, but so nice at the same time. I wish I had the balls to approach people I recognised!


Sunday, September 5, 2010

Finally you tubed my journey.....

This is something I have wanted to do for a long time, but never got around to it. This weekend I sat down and finally got it done. It's not exactly what I wanted, but its better than nothing!

Enjoy...... My journey.....


Monday, August 23, 2010

Here I am again...

I have had the most awesome weekend! I worked on Saturday, got heaps of work done, and finally my in tray is empty! My head feels much clearer now my desk is in order. On Sunday I had to go to Ikea to get something for my friend who doesn't have access to Ikea. So we choofed up there, daddy came and the little princess and he had $3 breakfast, he went to do the grocery shopping, she went to the kids club....and I went wandering. After kids club, we went next door and went through spotlight, then jumped in the car and went to the local "mall". All up we were shopping for 5 hours, had breakfast, cupcakes and lunch out, and topped it all off with a nanny nap! 18 months ago there is no way I could have done a marathon shopping trip like that! This is the freedom of my life now. I can go from one end of a mall and back and it doesn't wear me out like it used to!

The little princess will be little miss 6 in a month or so and this year I am going to attempt the cake. I saw this cake on a forum I visit last week and its awesome and super easy, so this will be the cake!
In true princess style she's decided she wants to stay at a hotel instead of having a party, so I am thinking we might spend what we planned on spending staying at the marriot at Surfers Paradise. She loves to swim and they have a pool that have real fish in it, she'll love it and I'll get a chance to get some sun!

Life is good!

Monday, August 16, 2010

Lots of questions

Wow I have been inundated with questions about the sleeve recently. Its so good to hear that so many people know about an op that I had never even heard of before my surgeon suggested it to me! I am so proud to be an advocate for getting the word out there! I hope it turns out to be the magic pill that we've all been searching for. I can't believe how my life has changed. The confidence I feel, the power I feel when shopping. I love being able to walk into a shop and take my pick off the shelves.

Although I have learnt why woman get so discouraged with the sizes.

I bought a new denim skirt on the weekend. Didn't try it on, just picked up a size 10. Got it home, it swims on me. But I kept it because I figured that a size 8 would be too tight. Its weird to wear something that bares my knees!! They have been hidden for so long!! This is the skirt:

Also shopping related! I bought a bikini the other day, its a size 10 and its a bit too small. No freaking wonder woman feel so bad when shopping.
I love it and wonder if I should just keep it! Its a string tie on the side, it just means the strings have to be tied a bit wider than they are designed IYKWIM?? But I love it, and I doubt the shop will exchange swimwear anyway.

Anyway I better get back to work, I have taken about 3 hours to type this between phone calls and people coming to the door! I don't know work getting in the way of blogging! How dare it!!?? I don't get many comments on this blog, except fo rthe asian ones and I have NFI what they say or why they are commenting! But please don't hesitate to ever ask me any questions. This op has been the best thing I have ever done for myself, and I want to share it with the world!

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Britt made me do it!

I have been shamed into posting. Britt mentioned me on her blog this morning so I thought I'd better get my arse into gear and actually blog.

I guess I don't blog anymore about my journey because I am pretty much at the end of my sleeve journey. I am at a weight that I am happy with. I do look a bit too skinny, but I'm ok with that.

I guess from now on I will use this blog as a reflection on my day to day comings and goings.....if I remember. I have all these romantic notions of having a lovely blog, but I lack the imaginiation and time it takes to keep my blog interesting and pretty.

I am having a shite day. I want to go home to bed, but I have a meeting tonight at 7pm. So I am going to work till about 6.15 then head off. If I go home the little princess won't let me leave, so its easier to stay here. I also have my grandfathers funeral to attend tomorrow morning, so I need to leave things in order...

I should let you know a little about Dar. Dar was our pet name for Grandad and even in my early 30's its still what I called him. Dar has been in a nursing home for a few years. He was just about to turn 91 in a couple of days. He had his good days, his great days and his, damn you I am not getting out of bed days. I hated to go visit because I would wonder what sort of day he was having. I have been very lucky and mostly saw him on his great days! Last time the little princess and I went to visit, he was sitting in his chair in the front room of the nursing home, eating his lunch. He smiled when I told him that Nana would be happy with him eating his lunch. We had cuddles and off we went, I found it difficult to spend too much time there because sometimes he didn't even know who we were. Apparently after we visited he told Nana that a beautiful little girl had been in to visit him.
On Sunday mum called from the hospital saying he wasn't doing very well He'd been taken in by ambulance and the nurses were warning that this might be it this time (as they had done every other time he'd been admitted) Bec (my sister) called me to see if I would like to go down with her to visit him, we just had a feeling. So we told the kids we were going out, she popped in to grab me and off we went. The trip there and back was spent talking of the old days, when Dar was the Dar we knew. Laughing about the man who used to chase us down the hallway with his slipper, and the gentle giant who would let us snuggle in his lap to play with his shirt collars. He always smelt like whiskey and tobacco when we were kids. He religiously had a whiskey in the afternoons to relax.
When we got there (7pm ish) we rang mum to find out where she was, she had taken Nana home. So Bec and I went in to visit. God, I wish I could remove the image from my mind. The strong man we knew was a shell. Over the years his body had slowly gotten smaller, no big round tummy that made him look 9 months pregnant! He had a nebulizer on and was really struggling to breath, but he knew we were there. He looked at us, we stroked his hand and gave him kisses on his head. We told him that we loved him, and we left. At 10.30 we had the phone call. Our brother had gone down to visit and was with him when he took his final breath. He said it was lovely, like he'd just fallen asleep. Its almost a relief, to struggle for breath is cruel, his body had served him well, and he had given us many many lovely memories and a wonderful family.

Rest in peace Dar, you're one in a million.


Wednesday, June 16, 2010


Well tonight I recieved a PM (personal message) from a member of a forum I frequent who said she was in tears after reading my blog. Her post sounds just like I felt 18months ago. The absolute desperation after doing diet after diet to only gain back any losses and then some. We've all done it, I am sure. One day something has to give, you either give up, and put on a front that you are happy with who you are, or you do something drastic. Well drastic was my option after feeling like she does one too many times. The reason behind this blog post, is not only nice to know people read my blog, but that it can be the inspiration behind someone making a life changing decision.
About 9 or 10 months ago my surgeon asked me to speak at a paitent seminar as a sucessful sleever. That night there was a lady there that I have had the pleasure to get to know on and off the gastric sleeve forum, she made the decision to go ahead, and she has just had her 6 month sleeversary and lost 30+kg. Its been such an honour to share her journey and her sucess.
To know that my story will make a difference to someone else's life makes my heart smile. This is the 'magic pill' we've all been waiting for. Most private health won't cover bariatric surgery anymore (not too sure about top level cover) so it can be an expensive option, but what is your life and your health worth to you? You can get money from your super if you really want to get it done and don't have the funds to pay for it. I was lucky, my surgery was done when it was still covered, but I was still about $5000 out of pocket, but to me that doesn't matter. I am now happy with my weight, and where I am in life.
For any further info or research see www.gastricsleevesupport.com Do something for you.

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Dietian visit...results!

Well I had my followup with Dan tonight. Its been 4 weeks since I saw him. I have put on 1.3kg! He is happy with that. I was dreading going because I got new scales and I didn't think I'd put any weight on and I thought I was going to be in trouble! I haven't taken my reflux meds today and am starting to feel a little reflux creeping in, so when I have finished here I promise to go take it. I am feeling so good now, I have energy, I am thinking about exercise, Dan has encouraged me to wait till I hit 50-52kg before I start weights but said I'd be best to start at least walking. He siad at this stage I am too underweight for muscles to really build, so I need to be closer to a 'normal' weight before I can gain muscle.

My husband started a new job today, he is happy and its so nice to see him happy and enthused about work again. He's good at what he does, and I am sure they will be happy they took so long and so indepth looks at his job history. He'll be worth it to them.

We celebrated our 7 year wedding anniversary on the 10th of May and on the 8th of June he will become an Australian citizen. Its going to be so nice for him to travel on an Australian passport, and god knows he's so opinionated about politians, finally he'll get a say!

We have also refinanced our home loan this week, so I have been busy getting all that stuff done and tonight have transferred all our stuff from one bank to another, so hopefully now thats all gone seamlessly.

Now the princess in bed, the icecream is ready and the State of Origin is about to kick off....so I am off.


Wednesday, May 19, 2010

You know...I can't for the life of me think of a title for this post.....

So I have been meaning to put something in here for days, and I just haven't been motivated to get around to it.

I am wondering if my body just likes hovering around the 50kg mark. A and I broke the scales a few weeks ago trying to replace the battery in it, so on Tuesday we popped into Aldi, and there were some there for $20, so I snapped them up. They measure body fat, bone weight, and how many calories I need a day to maintain my weight. I believe that was 1023 calories, but it flashes to quickly to remember, so I'll have to work out how to do it again, and get more accurate figures.

I have been eating heaps more, but not gaining any weight. But on the upside I haven't lost anymore either. I wonder if this is where I am supposed to be? I haven't been sick, I'm not having any problems eating, finally things feel good. I feel good. And my work is getting done!

Yay for normality!

Today in the mail I received some product samples from an online friend that are flavour free and can be added to pretty much everything, it came with a book that shows how it can change the make up of a meal (ie the protein before adding and after adding). The book is called food fortification to fight frailty, and its a really great read! Thanks Kate!!

Tonight I am off to the shops to get my nails done, and stock up my top drawer (read Lolly drawer) Its so nice to have the energy back to do things after work!!

Bring on life!!

Friday, May 7, 2010

My 12 month update....

OK so I have been slack again. You shouldn't really expect anything else from me....really.
The lead up to my 12 month sleeversary was spent throwing up. For some unknown reason I started to vomit everything I ate. We went to Melbourne on holiday and I hardly ate for the whole week, and when I did I had to find places to throw up. One night we had to all jump off the tram so I could spew in a park. I hurt my back in the spa because my bones were leaning on the wall, and pushing against the edge. I cried, and had a sore back the whole week. I got home and when I hit 46.8kg I panicked and rang my surgeon. I had a check up so he saw me then, told me I needed to eat more, and it didn't matter if I threw up as long as some stuff was staying down. I seemed to be able to get liquid in but nothing solid. So after I left his office (mum was with me) I got back to work and started to be sick, really violently, so mum sent me home to bed, and her and my siblings decided to stage an intervention. She rang my surgeon and cried and told him she thought she was going to lose me if something wasn't done. So he said send her up to the hospital and I'll admit her. So A packed everything up and rushed me up to the hospital. They put me on Ensure which is a high calorie shake that they give nursing home paitents, and I mostly threw that up. They kept me in hosptial for about 3 days (not sure how many I had it all posted on a forum, that was upgraded and I lost all the emotive postings I made during my recovery) When I got home I was still throwing up, and I sent an email to the surgeon, he rang me at 3.30pm and I was at the hosptial having a barium study done to see if I had a blockage (in the lead up to my admission I had an endoscopy that came up clear) They thought I may have had a slight twist in my tummy. I think they also wondered wether I was suffering from some sort of eating disorder. Anyway turns out the study was all clear and there isn't anything wrong. He did say I have a pouch thing that usually allows people to gain weight rather than lose it. Not me apparently! So anyway I decided it was up to me to get myself healthy. I met with the dietian and he told me how to add 3000 calories to my diet A DAY! So I have done what he said and this is the first 5 days I have had vomit free! I can eat, and keep it down, and twice this week I have had dinner twice! (A is an awesome cook!)
The dietitan wants me to aim for a 500 gram gain a week, I have gained 200 this week so far so its looking good. I have some photos of me at 50kg that I will add, but I am now on operation gain 10kg (At least) Who would have ever thought I'd have that problem!? I am feeling so much better, no longer full of regrets, and I can concentrate, which is making work a lot more tolerable, I was muddling through before, now I can concentrate and am not rushing at the last minute struggling for my attention to kick in.
So now I need to add some kilos then I can start on some muscle regain. My butt is funny, it looks like a 60 year old woman. My hip bones stick out and I look sick, the photos I have posted don't look too bad, but I do, I look sick, and unhealthy,
but soon I won't. Bring it on!! My surgeon and dietitian have been great through all of this, and finally I hope to be a model example for a successful sleever for them!


Friday, April 2, 2010

How to stop......help starting to worry now!

Ok so I am starting to get a little concerned with the amount of weight I am losing. I weigh less than 2 of my 5 year old. I have lost more weight than I currently weigh. I am uncomfortable in bed because I have no padding between my knees. My tailbone is uncomfortable all the time. (I watched a show last week where a lady had hers removed because it stuck out so much after weightloss) I just walked past a mirror at work and I couldn't believe how skinny my arms look. I almost look skeletal. I have no idea how to stop this and my next appointment isn't till the 30th April.
I took a pic of my arm, to show you how it looks:


Any ideas on what to eat to bulk up. And don't say chips, chocolate and full cream milk cause I do all of that now!

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

So its 20 days from being 1 year sleeved.....

I can't believe that its been 12 months since I made the decision to be sleeved. I was tired, fat, uncomfortable, unhealthy and the rest.

I am now a healthy weight, I have heaps of energy, I can cross my legs comfortably, I can sit on the couch with my knees to my chest, I can do so much more than I could, and every day I am thankful.

I would have never in 1000 years imagined that I would have the success I'd heard about. I thought I'd be a failure. When explaining the operation to people I never ever believed that I would get to a target weight, I even set my first major goal at 75kg, never thinking I'd get below that, and here I am today at 53kg. Unbelievable.

So I have posted some of the damage to my body pictures. I have a butt like a 60 year old woman, but I really only have myself to blame. I should have exercised and I didn't, and now I am wishing like hell I had. This is on my knees to show you the hang.

And front on:
And side on:

On the weekend we built Sarah a bunk bed, and I spent a lot of time on my hands and knees crawling around putting things where they belonged, and the belly hang felt really weird. But I am trying to be happy with what I have, but its weird to have hanging bits, when before it was all nice and smooth, all be it plump!

I do need to get back and see my dietitian I am very slack in that regard. I haven't seen him for ages, and I whinge about still losing weight, but I still haven't done anything about improving it. Typical lazy Libby!

Anyway that's where I am at, be back soon! Thanks for reading!

Thursday, March 4, 2010


Arrgghhh slackity slack!!! Thought I'd post that I have 900grams to lose before I am 1/2 the woman I used to be!!
I am off to the races tomorrow, I have posted a pic of what I looked like at my last races outing and a pic of my new dress for tomorrows races!! What a difference!!

My new dress shows my knees. I never ever wear anything that shows my knees, but I guess tomorrow will prove that I can go out baring my knees now!

This is so weird. In such a short space of time so much has changed. The confidence I feel now is so high. I walk taller, and I walk with pride.

Lastnight I tried on a size 8 and it was too big!! Just such a change from this time last year, I was a 22-24. I can't believe the changes in my life since then!! I am almost 11 months out, I can't believe that its been nearly a year already!!!

I am still running into people that I know who don't recognise me, its quite empowering! Anyway till next time! Keep safe

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

God...I am so slack!

I am so bad at this blogging thing! I decided on the weekend it was time for a change. I wanted to hack off all my hair. I took a pic into the hairdresser for her to have something to work with.
The above is the pic I took in of Katie Holmes, compared to the pic I got taken when I got home. Nothing alike...right?? I actually wanted a fringe, mum hates it when I have my hair slicked back, and I am starting to not like it either. My face is too long and narrow to wear it like that, so next hair cut I will get them to make a fringe. Its settled down heaps now, she fluffed it all up, I like it better when it sits flatter. Now just to get some colour into it, and gloss it up a bit! So this is the shortest my hair has ever been, and now a few days later I am loving it!

I have been watching a show on foxtel lately that is about plastic surgery after weightloss. And its making me want it more and more. I always said after the disaster my last operation was (the recovery really. I always said that I'd never ever have optional surgery again, but my boobs look like envelope flaps when I am standing up, cows udders when I am leaning forward, and pancakes when I am on my back. My thighs flap, my tummy has a little stretched skin that could do with tightening. I have tuckshop lady arms, that seem to be getting worse. I swear people look at the wrinkeld But I feel vain doing that, although I'd really love to!

I do need to get off my butt and join a gym, or at least start walking, I talk about it with the best intentions, but I never do it. Much like diets in the past, and we know where that got me!

Anyway thats enough from me,
Thanks for reading! Talk soon!

Monday, February 8, 2010

The wean starts....

Well I have been on steriods for a week to see if they help my leg recover from nerve damage. It seems to be working!! I have started to wean off them, which is weird, who would have thought 1 week of pills then a week to wean off them! But finally I feel like I am able to walk properly. I am no longer dragging my leg behind me, and walking with a limp! I haven't nearly fallen over since my last lot of carpet burn over 3 weeks ago!! Go me!!

We have our first parent information night at school tonight. Seems that the kids have settled in well. The little princess loves coming home and telling me all about her day! Last night we had our first night of homework! Luckily its fairly basic and easy to do! She is sleeping well, and our routine seems to be falling into place. I am loving the snuggles in bed while we read a bedtime story, and she just rolls over and drifts off to sleep. This bug school stuff is tiring!

Life is good!

Friday, February 5, 2010

Basking in the glow!

I am having a warm fuzzy day today. Child free night last night, we didn't get home till midnight and lay away talking to 2am. It was so nice. Slept today till 8 (unheard of!) and then toddled off to a support group meeting with the people who have had the same op and me with the same surgeon. Its so great to be able to encourage people on their journey. From those who can't see how its possible to limit your intake so much, to those who think they will never ever get to their goal weight. It seems so unatainable, 50kg sounds so massive to me, but I have been lucky enough that it just melted away. I have no idea wether this is how its supposed to work, or if I am just lucky, but so far so good! Now to maintain. I am having a hard time getting clothes, 8's are a tad too small and 10's are too big. Less than 10 months ago I was a size 22 pushing 24, its just UNBELIEVABLE. So there i t is, from the fatest laziest person I know, I have become who I want to be. My song before was this one:

Now I am who I want to be......finally I am me......

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

An extra update!

Well I have taken some more pics, these are approx 51kg down. And pre op for comparison.


The hunt begins.....

For the last 12 months or so at work has been lovely. I work with great people in the office, but the other day one of them resigned. So its back to the drawing board, new staff member search is on!

Training not my forte, but its going to be my job. We have our first candidate up for an interview tomorrow. Its just so hard to make a decision in a short meeting. I have a list of description of duties. I think I have learnt my lesson from previous employees. Who would have thought it so difficult to find the "right" person.

There is nothing worse than putting in the time to train someone and then for it not to work out. Hopefully this time things go smoothly! Fingers crossed!

The stress of training and making sure I do it properly is daunting, but hopefully my errors in previous cases have taught me well!

So bring it on, I look forward to welcoming the right person into the fold of the family business!